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Ode to intensity

Happy February! I can't believe that it's only been one month since the start of 2023. I was reflecting on the month behind us and realized just how much had happened. It feels like three months instead of just one.

January has been a wild ride for me. Filled with intense thoughts and feelings. First, there was a lot of 'doing': I threw a NYE party at my place in Cambridge, I organized a NY Masterclass which some of you attended, and I travelled to the States to visit friends in the Bay Area. When I came back mid-January, I had a lot of PhD work waiting for me: I prepared and gave a presentation in front of the entire department, I drastically rewrote my research proposal, and started drafting fieldwork funding applications. My work for The Smart Rebel also intensified: while I continue to coach 1-1 and lead the Gifted Go-Getter Mastermind, I have also started working on what will the newest addition to the business: a podcast! I recorded the first 5 episodes this weekend, and phew.... let's just say, the level of vulnerability is through the roof. Add to that Bachata dance classes, meet-ups with friends, dates, jazz concerts, and a ton of band rehearsals...

January has been full on.

But not just in terms of 'doing'. Also in terms of 'feeling'. January has been a month of emotional turbulence. My heart feels very open. I have the rawest conversations on a daily basis, both while coaching and when I'm with friends. It has been a month of reconnecting with some, and disconnecting with others. A month of companionship, and of loneliness. A month of joy, and of sorrow. A month of clarity, and of confusion. A month of doors closing, and windows opening. A month of laughs and tears. A month of energy and exhaustion.

In short, January has been a month of contrasts. Of big energy shifts, and unexpected mood swings in rapid succession. A month of wild ups and downs, with my heart taking it all in, both the good and the bad, the pleasurable and the painful, the heartache and the healing.

I realize this may sound very familiar to you: he seemingly contradictory emotions and sensations, experienced in a jumble, all at once. People may not always understand when you try to explain the complexity of such an inner life. How could you be both sad and happy at once? Connected and alone at once? Joyful and nostalgic at once?

But this rich inner life, filled with contradictions and extremes, is very much part of the gifted experience. We're intense humans, with big feelings. We're sensitive, we're easily touched, moved, impacted. This goes for both the ups and the downs. We feel it all deeply, at the core of our being.

And if you ask me, that's a beautiful thing.

Even when going through rough patches, I am grateful for sadness. Grateful for solitude. Grateful for fear. Grateful for the full range of feelings I get to live through. Because that's what it is about: it's about living. Deeply, fully, intensely.

It's about aliveness. And living through the full spectrum of life experiences.

Feeling alive is a beautiful thing. It's something to be grateful for.

So if you're currently going through a rough patch, or if you've had a wild January just like me, I hope these words will help you to see the beauty in your inner intensity.

Keep on feeling those feelings, that are there for you to feel.

Keep on living this life, that is here for you to live.

The Smart Rebel Podcast

We're working hard behind the scenes on something I am super excited about: a podcast! The Smart Rebel Podcast is where I coach people in a one-off session on any topic they bring to the table (and sometimes, there is no such idea beforehand, and we simply see what emerges during the conversation). The first episodes have already been recorded, and I am just blown away by the powerfulness of the conversations I've had so far. I cannot wait to share them with you, as I know the listening experience will be rich with insights and aha-moments for gifted people around the world. What's more: you can now apply to be coached on the podcast! The session is free of charge, and you can choose to remain entirely anonymous. Our list of podcast coachees is growing rapidly, please click the button below for more information on how to apply and how to get in touch with Daniel, who is my (absolutely amazing) production assistant.

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